Practical Tips for Growing in Faith

There were times in the course of my hectic career when my prayer life and spiritual growth suffered. Priorities weren’t always in order and the urgent eclipsed the important. Over the years, however, I have found ways to keep my focus on what matters. Here is what has worked for me:

  1. Schedule daily rosary as I would any meeting. For those of you who have this as a practice, you know that it is contagious. The weapon of the rosary in our daily battle has no equal. If you want to understand more about this guided walk through the life and power of our Lord, check out this movie “Power in My Hands”
  2. Schedule daily bible reading. Before I was a Catholic I was a very engaged Protestant, so the importance of being immersed in scripture is not new to me. However, my observation is that many Catholics are not as aware of the importance of reading God’s word as they should be. I have heard many priests and other church leaders preaching on the importance of reading the Bible but somehow I feel like the old school thinking- that it is too hard for lay people to understand -remains. First- buy a Catholic Bible so you have the complete version. Second- read 4 chapters a day, starting with the New Testament. Third- if you come across things you don’t understand, ask your priest. Just get going! It is amazing to me how often there is something that really jumps out at me as the message I need to hear – to point out a blind spot, or to give a word of encouragement.
  3. Never miss church or Holy Days of Obligation- that’s a given. But also try to get to church more often during the week. I am not always successful at this, but the renewal I get when I go to a midweek service makes we wonder why I don’t do it more often. It is like a long drink on a hot day to be in the presence of our Lord mid-week. Church isn’t just for Sunday, it is an opportunity to really be in communion. If we don’t love church, what makes us think we will like being in Heaven?
  4. Really make use of technology- we so often think of technology as a negative in our society, but technology can be leveraged for so much good if we harness it properly. There are excellent apps, like RosaryMate to guide you through the daily rosary, or Relevant Radio, for excellent Catholic programming. I watch EWTN on YouTube while folding laundry- my favorite programs are The World Over or reruns of Mother Angelica Live. I have numerous groups that I follow on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram- they are too numerable to mention individually but suffice it to say that you can spend hours on these sites getting news, prayers and other Catholic enrichment on these sites.
  5. Read books that reinforce your faith. The current book on my nightstand is Catholic Martyrs of the 20th Century by Robert Royal. It is incredibly motivating to read the lives of saints and other leaders in the faith. Before watching mindless tv or reading something that isn’t edifying, consider a book that can bring you closer to our Lord!
  6. Participate in extra curricular activities at church. Almost every church has some group you can join. Most recently my church started a bible study lead by our priest (if you live in NYC and want to join, message me!). If your church doesn’t have anything, consider being the catalyst to getting something started!
  7. Develop Catholic friendships. Friends come from all walks of life and I personally find it really valuable to have friends with a wide variety of perspectives. It is, however, also important to cultivate friendships with people who are focused on their faith – iron sharpens iron. I am in the process of starting a group for Catholic professional women because I found that to be a place where I see a need.
  8. Pray with family. When my youngest son was a toddler we started saying evening prayers together, and I couldn’t have predicted how much of an impact it had on all of us. Now my son joins from time to time when I say my rosary. We are super inconsistent about praying before meals, so this is one area that I want to get better in 2019!!
  9. Pray for people when in public places – my favorites are on the subway and in Grand Central Station. I often wonder how to truly “pray without ceasing” as we are called to do, but one thing I have found really enjoyable is to pray for people as I pass them on the street. I pray that they feel the presence of God in their lives. I pray for their peace and health- whatever comes into my mind.
  10. Fast – this is a new one for me. When I was reading my bible recently, the verse, Mark 9:29, where Jesus tells the Apostles that they can only rid the boy of the evil spirit through prayer and fasting, really jumped out at me. What it said to me is that there is spiritual power in fasting and that I was not making use of this. I have started slow- fasting according to Catholic guidelines on Wednesdays and on Friday just not eating meat. When I feel hungry or weak I offer that up as a sacrifice for my prayer intentions.
  11. Confession – I go every two months. I often think that I should go more often but for right now that is the cadence. It is such a cleansing and beautiful experience. I strongly encourage anyone to go. Pope John Paul II apparently went every day. When we realize how far short we fall of the glory of God, it isn’t about whether we are actively lying or hurting people (although we do that too) – but about whether we are loving as we should, or whether we are as unselfish and sacrificial as we could be.

I am still working on my practices, and I welcome any suggestions that you may have on what else I could do to strengthen my walk with God. The goal is to grow in holiness in hopes that one day I will see Him face to face in heaven. I pray that for all who read this as well!

What is Love?

Sometimes being a parent seems like a never ending stream of nagging reminders- even if you don’t want to be that person. Yesterday my son came home from his team’s practice – he was tired and cranky and very unhappy with his coach. She made them wear pantyhose- which not only made swimming way harder (that was the point) – but it also bruised his male ego to put on such a feminine item. I get it.

However, I did feel the need to stop his ranting about the coach.

I told him, “Jesus calls for us to love everyone- even your coach. You may not really like her, she may not even be a good coach, but she is doing the best she can, and you need to try to see Jesus in her.” I guess I was sort of taking liberties with the “she is doing the best she can” part- I don’t really know that, but I also don’t think that was the point. We are called to love.

My smart son then asked me, “what does it mean that I am supposed to love her?”. Hmmmm. In my head I am like “you know, LOVE her!” but I realize that is not really a great answer. So I say “you want her to go to heaven”. He says “I want everyone to go to heaven”. Ok.

So what is love? What does it look like to be loving? Well the best place I know to look for the answers of life is the Bible- and there we have it in Corinthians 13:4-7, the oft-read-at-weddings:

“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”

So when it comes to the swim coach, not getting angry, not using dishonoring language, and keeping no record of wrongs would seem to go a long way in answering the question. I wish I would have thought of this at the time – but the good news is that this is the best place to pick up the conversation when he comes home from school today! 🙂

Happy New Year- Let’s Praise Him in the Storm!

All of the hectic madness of the holidays have past, and we are now back to the “reality” of every day life. If you are like me, you may still be processing the holidays. For me 2019 got off to a considerably rocky start, with a combination of significant family illness, relationship discord, and otherwise shaky ground. To this I say, “Thank you Lord Jesus!” It wasn’t that long ago in my life when being battered about by life’s vicissitudes wouldn’t have elicited that response- so what’s so great about life stinking?

  1. We are never closer to Jesus then when we are in the depths of bad times. Just as the apostles learned when the storm hit and they were sure they were goners (Matthew 8:24), Jesus can calm the seas, and it is in these times that we see His power- to calm our hearts, to comfort our sadness, and to carry us through eventually to the shores. We can see His glory in a way that is sometimes easy to take for granted when everything is going the way we want it to go.
  2. When life is turned upside down, I take incredible comfort in the rosary and in daily mass in a way that may not be as profound when it is the good times. Really being able to be thankful for the power of the Eucharist and knowing that God is very much present takes on greater depth when the need is so profound. It also reminds me that there is nothing that I can suffer that comes close to the burden that he bore for me. Perspective is everything. Also, being able to bring my problems to my Mother Mary – knowing that she knows what I am experiencing as a mother, as a daughter, as a person – but that I can aspire to be like her in selflessness and holiness further changes the perspective.
  3. Having the sacrifice of suffering that binds me closer to my Lord and allows me to participate in His passion is an incredible gift. I can offer my hurt to Him in thanksgiving, and I can also offer my pain for my loved ones in purgatory- having something that I can share that could maybe be of use to those poor souls is incredibly gratifying. It makes me want to embrace my bad times, and look forward to more, rather than trying to drop my cross or run from it.
  4. The bad times inspires me to focus more on the lives of the saints- to find support from those who will pray for me and my family, and to see that others have been through much worse and have reaped their reward in heaven. Our earthly and temporal troubles are fleeting – no matter what this life is short- but the real prize is what happens in eternity.
  5. Bad times also are like a mirror where we can see ourselves more clearly- and sometimes we find the places where we need to have more humility, offer more grace, or be more loving than we have been. The purification process can work if we let it.

Like everyone else, I enjoy life to be filled with smooth sailing and to get my way all the time. That isn’t reality and it is also not good for me in my quest for holiness. For right now I have only one New Year’s resolution- and that is to grow in holiness. If that comes from having some hard times, then the only real response is “Thank You Jesus!”

Looking for a place to give this Christmas? I have an idea!

Abortion is an incredibly polarizing topic however, I would like to try to approach it from the perspective of reconciliation (particularly in this Advent season!)- and importantly how can we help woman who have decided not to abort but who are significantly in need.  Let me start by giving some background on my own experiences with the medical establishment that promotes abortion, which to me has provided perhaps a different perspective.  In short, I have had experience in two instances that are frequently sited as “good reasons” to have abortion- the first when there is “something wrong” with the baby, and the second when “the life of the mother is at stake”.  Here is my story:

The year was 1988 and I had given birth to a significantly premature baby in January.  My son was released from the hospital in February- but still suffering from apnea episodes that resulted in “forgetting” to breath.  As a result, I was one tired and scared 23 year old. I learned when he was about 2 months old that I was again pregnant.  I very much had a “the more the merrier” view of having children- but a couple of months into the pregnancy I was told that my baby “may” have a condition that would be “incompatible with life”.  Long story short, by the time it was clear that there were issues (although still not sure whether these were issues that would be remedied by surgery at birth, or bigger problems resulting in the baby’s death), I was right up against the legal gestational age to have an abortion in the state of California.  The idea of having an abortion never really crossed my mind, but the doctors and other medical personnel that I was seeing lobbied incredibly hard for me to have an abortion.  They were crystal clear with me that they wanted me to have an abortion ASAP. My own personal convictions (rooted in the teaching of my parents) made it clear to me that the right decision for us was to let the chips fall where they may – and not have an abortion.  Unfortunately, a week later I went into preterm labor and my beautiful little son died shortly after an emergency c-section was performed.  As sad and difficult as it was to have lost a baby – all of you who know what it’s like to come home to the empty nursery know what I am talking about- I felt peace in my heart knowing that I did what I could.  However, I also felt that I had to truly fight off an army of medical personnel that could have easily convinced me that abortion was the right thing to do, had I not been taught from a young age that this was not the answer.

Fast forward to 2005, and my oldest was 17, my second child was 14 and I had a one year old toddler.  Again, I found that I was pregnant, and again I thought “the more the merrier”.  The delivery of my one year old had been medically very difficult, but I was still surprised when I went to my OB-Gyn who told me “I will not deliver another of your babies.  You will almost certainly die and I am not going to be a party to that.  I will give you an abortion, or you will have to find another doctor” – and at that point I happily said goodbye and set about to find a doctor that was ok riding this wave of uncertainty with me.  Was this hard for my family?  Of course it was.  But I was blessed with a husband who was in full agreement that we needed to trust God and pray for the best.  At four months pregnant I did lose the baby – and was in the hospital for a week fighting for my own life- and I am deeply grateful to be here to tell the story.  It could have had a very different outcome, and as sad as I am that my one baby girl isn’t here with us, I know that she – and her older brother- are in heaven, and I will see them one day.  What stays with me from this experience again, was the very hard sell from the doctor that the “right thing to do” was to have an abortion.  So twice now I have had to fight the medical establishment to keep from having an abortion.

My take away from all of this is that there are many, many women who are in very vulnerable situations.  Either afraid for their own lives, or convinced that there babies will “die anyway” – or others who risk alienation from their families, or worry about how to feed and support a baby – and so many more reasons that the persuasion from a medical professional strong arming them into having an abortion seems like the voice of reason.  Had I had a husband who felt strongly about me having an abortion, for instance, it is possible that I could have been talked into it.  In these times of great stress, people are vulnerable and looking for solutions.

This is why I love the work that is being done at the Good Counsel Homes .  It is an actual solution, providing alternatives to women who are pregnant and in distress – either financially, from their families, or otherwise.  I had the opportunity last week to attend a wonderful fundraiser for this organization, and I can’t say enough about how the help that they give women and their babies is changing lives.  Not only in the short run, to give the babies a chance at life, but also really meaningfully investing in the lives of the mothers so that they can get to the place where they can really support their families.  Not judging the women for being in a situation that they didn’t plan to be in, but rather treating them with love and helping them to build for a better future.

One young mother spoke at the fundraiser, and it was incredibly inspiring.  She became pregnant in high school, and her parents told her that she could have an abortion or she had to get out.  In her heart she knew that having an abortion wasn’t the decision she could live with.  She lived for a while with another family member but the discord that was causing with her parents reached a state where she needed to find an alternative.  She moved into Good Counsel Homes, where initially she had planned to give her baby up for adoption.  Instead over time she saw that she would be able to have her baby, and Good Counsel also helped her to get her CNA so she could get a job.  She eventually reconciled with her parents, but Good Counsel continued to be involved in her life, giving her a scholarship so she could continue with her studies- and she is currently working towards an RN, and a much brighter future for her and her baby.

What a beautiful alternative, to change the future direction of the mother’s life as well as the child’s life.  This Christmas, consider donating to Good Counsel Homes – they are doing incredibly important work, and most certainly making the world a better place.

Guilt and Reconciliation

I was in a bible study last week, which was lead by my wonderful parish priest.  We were studying the book of John, chapter 18, which is so rich in providing insight into the nature and person of our Lord, Jesus Christ.  At one point the conversation turned to the statement by Pontius Pilate, “what is truth?”. Pilate would be very popular in 2018. Why do people today fight so hard to say that there is no absolute truth?  There is, instead today, the concept of “my truth” – which is, by definition, not the same as the truth.  Why?  Because for all of us, there is the small, still voice that convicts us when we are guilty- and we don’t like it.

My priest said this- which I thought really was worth writing down, and also sharing.  He said:

People often say that the Catholic Church is about guilt.  It is not.  Life is about guilt.  The Catholic Church is about forgiveness from guilt. 

Yes, and yes, and yes again!    We have a choice- we can acknowledge our guilt and ask for forgiveness, which is freely given and our sins paid for by the blood of Christ.  Alternatively we can turn our back on holiness and say that – instead- “my truth” is as good as “your truth”- and in fact, there is no truth at all.  Echoing Pilate- “what is truth”?  The reality is that God has given us truth- in His word, and in the teachings of His church.

Before I became Catholic, there were a few things for me that I thought were “nonstarters” about the Catholic Church.  One of them was the sacrament of reconciliation – better known as confession.  I thought the idea that you had to go tell your sins to another human – a creature who is no better than me – was dumb.  I reasoned that God heard my request for forgiveness, so why this unnecessary, and embarrassing step?  I agreed that there is truth, and therefore guilt, but I didn’t like this “unnecessary step” to get my sins forgiven.

Over time, however, I learned a few things that made me fall in love with the sacrament of reconciliation:

  1. First, once I decided to become Catholic, I knew it wasn’t right to do it halfway.  I didn’t have to be Catholic- I was choosing to be- so I figured I needed to do it right, which means observing the “rules”.  Begrudgingly I started to got to confession- but not because I thought it was something I needed, it was more of a sense that I needed to be obedient to the Church.  What I eventually learned from this is that obedience to the Church is always for our own good.  Our reasoning can be faulty, God’s cannot be.
  2. I began to see numerous scripture references for a priest being the vehicle for absolution from sin, the more I read my bible.  It is very, very clear in the Catholic Church that it is God, and God alone, who forgives sin.  But priests were used throughout the Old Testament to administer that forgiveness and absolution.  But we are New Testament creatures as Christians- so what about that?  John 20:21-23 makes it clear:

Jesus said to them again, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, even so I send you.” And when he had said this, he breathed on them, and said to them, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”

The apostles were commissioned, as the first priests of the early church, to act on Jesus’ behalf once He returned to heaven, and so it is today.  Therefore getting absolution from a priest was part of Jesus’ design.

3. Finally, what I have found is that there is something that most certainly sharpens      the mind, and heart, regarding sin when you have to have to speak it aloud.  For many years I did pray for forgiveness from sin, but it is only when I started really making the practice of confession part of my life that I really felt the weight of my sin.  Some people may think that is a bad thing – who wants to feel that? But the thing is this- we will feel the weight of our sins eventually- whether in this life or in the next one.  And more importantly, when we really recognize that it is our sin that nailed our Savior to the cross, the weight of that guilt and sadness should cause us to want to aspire to holiness in this life.  It also creates a level of gratitude in us for our sins being wiped clean by His sacrifice – and the only natural response is to want to confess and pray for the grace to live a holier life tomorrow.

This Advent is a wonderful time to participate in the sacrament of reconciliation.  The burden lifted is an incredible joy! Even if you haven’t been in years, it is never too late.  It is a great feeling indeed!  Forgiveness is so, so close- why not take it?

Sorrow that Leads to Joy

I love Christmas and now that we are in the season of Advent, I am deeply immersed in Christmas music, decorations, cooking and all of the sights, sounds and smells of this glorious time of year.  But in just the last couple of days I have spoken with a few friends who are in real and true pain this season.  I get it- I have certainly had the periods in my life where losing a loved one, suffering with the depression and confusion in people you love so dearly- and would gladly take their pain- but there is nothing you can do- except pray and love. This time of year can punctuate the highs, but very much magnify the lows as well.

Since the beginning of October I have been saying the rosary daily.  Prior to that I would say the rosary from time to time- when I thought of it or found myself with 20 minutes of free time.  But now it is an intentional practice that I look forward to every day.  They say it takes 30 days to make a habit, and I am happy that in this case it seems to stick.  Different aspects of the mysteries speak to me at different times, but it is no surprise that the Sorrowful mysteries as the ones that really resonate when I am meditating on the pain and suffering of friends, loved ones, the world – and even beloved souls who may be in purgatory.

There is a view that seems widely shared among “older people” today that “young people” are too sensitive today.  “Suck it up buttercup” and jeers of “snowflake” are all too common.  It occurred to me today that if it is true that young people may not have the same grit as their elders (although I would argue that we have certainly had thousands of troops fighting for years now who are certainly as courageous and brave as their predecessors) one reason may be that people are not as immersed in scripture as they once were.  If you can accept- and believe- that the savior of the world

Praying for our Kids

“Carry on my wayward son, there’ll be peace when you are done.  Lay your weary head to rest, don’t you cry no more…”

Whenever I sing the refrain to that excellent classic rock song, my eyes tear up.  Maybe it’s being the mother of boys – men really now- that it gets me.  But it is more than that.  It is the reminder- every time- that I didn’t raise them in the church- and the gut wrenching worry that comes from that.  In fairness (and thanks very much to my Catholic husband), I am now Catholic as is my youngest.  I didn’t know what I didn’t know with my wonderful older boys- and so I pray.

But I am comforted by the fact that I was too a very wayward teen and young adult, and I found my way back to the Church.

This Christmas season the acute feeling of sadness that can come when all of the people you love are not embracing the reason for the season needs to be balanced with the hope we know.  The hope that unto us a child was born who is the redeemer of the world.  He knows and loves our kids even more than we do- hard to get the mind wrapped around that sometimes- but it is true.  And just like He found us and brought us back, He can find our kids.  It may be long after we are gone- but He never stops loving them and calling to them.  What can we do in the meantime?

  1. Pray, pray pray!  God hears our prayers and he is faithful.  It doesn’t mean we get what we want – God is not a magic trick and he has given our kids the same freewill that we both love and fight against every single day.  But our prayers are powerful- and pray the rosary daily!!
  2. Set a good example.  It is so hard sometimes to be loving when there are affronts to the things we hold dear as Catholic Christians.  But love – especially when it is hard. Holidays can be stressful and tempers can sometimes run hot.  There is a reason that self control is one of the fruit of the Spirit- ask the Holy Spirit to bathe you in the self control you need to make it through with peace and joy!
  3. Never give up.  Even in small ways remind your kids and loved ones that the joy you have comes from Jesus.  Select decorations, movies, Christmas music etc all that reflect the true purpose – the birth of Jesus.  The more you drop the hints, eventually it may begin to penetrate.
  4. Be generous.  Remember that we are not saints either and it is easy to pick on others flaws.  Remember also that holding a non-Christian to the standards of behavior of a Christian makes no sense.  But in all things give people the grace that we have so freely received.
  5. Develop a thick skin.  Inevitably there will be times of sadness or hurt feelings.  Remember that our sins caused far more pain and suffering in our Lord than our kids will ever cause us – and he was blameless and we are not.

When I think about where I was 35 years ago, I was as lost as a person could be.  Thanks to God’s amazing grace- and the people he put in my path dropping breadcrumbs along the way, I am back.  Here is to the hope that all of our children find their way as well- where there is indeed peace.

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Why a Catholic Christian Education?

We are coming down the home stretch of the high school application process for my youngest son.  It shouldn’t be a project, but it is. When I was in high school (back in my day…) you just went to the one and only public high school in your district so there was nothing to think about.  In New York City it is a cornucopia of choices- which is a blessing and is also something that makes your head spin.

My son made the choice to apply to Catholic high schools.  For this I am exceedingly grateful. We have been so blessed to have him in a Classical Christian School from Pre-K through 8th grade (with the exception of 2 years when we moved to London)- and I never would have imagined that we could have found a school that is so centered on Christ the way that his current school is – especially not in New York City.  It is an oasis of grace in what otherwise often feels like Sodom and Gomorrah- but we are called to be in the world and hopefully we can be a small light here in New York City too.

His current school is not a Catholic school – it is a non-denominational Christian school.  But they do a phenomenal job of focusing on Jesus and education and leaving the denominational differences to the parents.  The school has helped him to cultivate a real love for the Lord without in any way arguing against the beliefs we hold dear as Catholics.  I remember when he was in the 4th grade and they were studying the Reformation and I was expecting to hear that the teacher had provided some personal editorial comments to the historical facts (particularly since she was also a Protestant pastor’s wife).  But that never happened- not once. It was all very much a study of what happened and what were the issues on all sides, as delivered by a remarkably talented and thoughtful teacher. Given that Catholics make up probably 10% of the school population I am grateful that there has been no friction.  The school only goes through the 8th grade, so now we embark on the journey of high school.

One of the schools that my son is applying to requires the parents to answer the question: What is the single most important contribution that a school can offer your child?  I loved that they asked the question because it gave me the chance to really think about why it matters so much for me to see him go to a Catholic school.  So I wrote:

As John Paul II wrote in his 1979 Message to the National Catholic Educational Association, “Catholic education is above all a question of communicating Christ, of helping to form Christ in the lives of others.” The most important thing that a high school can offer my son is to deepen his understanding of Jesus as the focal point of his life. While it is our hope that he will learn skills in school that will help him get to college and eventually be employed, these are incidental to the most essential element of spiritual development. The development of diligence, focus, academic excellence, and dedication to community will come as a by-product of being a more evolved disciple of Christ. Ultimately in attending a Catholic high school it is my hope that Michael continues to grow in Christ, and in that be able to fulfill the purpose for which he has been given his life.

I pray that all of our children have the opportunity to explore and build their faith.  At the end of the day, everything else pales in importance.

Hearts are Heavy- What to Do?

Screen Shot 2018-11-12 at 2.01.46 PMMy heart is heavy as I write this- which for people who know me recognize this as an unnatural state for me.  Naturally optimistic and basically a happy person – but today I am filled with foreboding. I can’t help but see the signs that the world is unraveling- much in the way it has been predicted on many occasions.  I struggle because I am far from a theologian and I don’t have the depth to really speak authoritatively on matters of the church or of faith. But I know what is in my heart – and I know that the human race has strayed so far from where we should be- and that just as God is love, he also requires justice- and we as a people are far from the saints we should be.

As Catholics we find ourselves at a time where the Church is in great upheaval.  But the reality is that the Church is, and was and will be. We can get distracted by all sorts of harsh realities of the world- but we need to instead focus on the things that we know – and the things that we can do.  Here is what I know:

 

  1. The rosary is the most effective weapon we have against Satan.  Our Mother Mary gave this to us and has repeatedly told us – in many an apparition- to pray fervently.  Pray the rosary every day- pray for the Church, pray for the souls in Purgatory, pray for our priests, pray for our families and for each other.  This is not a passive exercise – this is the working of prayer warriors and it works!

 

  1. Read the Bible. Jesus Christ is the Word become flesh.  We can’t really know him unless we immerse ourselves in His Word.  I know many Catholics who feel like they aren’t supposed to read the Bible- this is nonsense.  God gave us the Bible. Do I understand all of what I read? Not always- but ask your priest if you don’t understand. Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten your mind and explain it to you.  Just do it!

 

  1. Go to mass- and if you can get there, do it more than on Sunday.  Refresh yourself. This is a battle and we have to continue to renew ourselves.  This happens at mass. Participation in the Eucharist is the most amazing gift that God has given us.  Jesus literally comes to us as He promised He would. What a miracle! What a gift!

 

  1. Go to confession- the sacrament of reconciliation is a cleansing forgiveness from God that is such a blessing!  As a Catholic convert I do understand the argument that God hears our apologies even if we don’t go to confession. The thing is- the Sacrament of Reconciliation is based on scripture.  I found this to be a really good explanation of where and how that is.

 

  1. Examine your life and your heart.  Actively seek areas where you may be in sin- and when in doubt, ask your priest! If you find that someone has something against you, ask for forgiveness.  If Jesus comes back tomorrow, it will be too late to do all the things we should have done!

 

  1. Guard your mind and what you dwell on.  We are told in Colossians 3:2 to “Set your mind on things above” – so turn off movies or tv shows that glorify sin, and turn on the many, many things that are elevating (my personal favorite are the reruns of Mother Angelica on EWTN- YouTube has them all!).  I am also currently reading the book “Catholic Martyrs of the 20th Century- A Comprehensive World History” by Robert Royal – very sobering and humbling indeed!

 

We were promised that we would have difficulties in this life, so experiencing pain – in our bodies, in our hearts, in our churches and in our world- should not come as a surprise to any of us.  Let’s lift up our hearts to the Lord, ask our loving Mother Mary to pray for us, and be joyful on this day that we serve a glorious God!

Love Pope Francis, Even if You Don’t Like Him Very Much

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Photo by Alem Su00e1nchez on Pexels.com

It seems that the world is split in its opinion of Pope Francis- as it is split about so many issues these days.  What I have noticed among the circle of people I know, is that the non-Christians and avid secularists seem to think Pope Francis is terrific – right up there with Bill Clinton and Barack Obama.  The Christians – and in particular the devout Catholics- seem much less enthusiastic.

I had an exchange on Facebook the other day with a godly man who used the #notmypope in response to Pope Francis’ recent meeting with Michael Moore.  It could have just as easily been in response to his previous meeting with the abortion promoting lead singer of U2, Bono. Or it could have been used in his acquiescence to the communist government of China in allowing them to select the bishops in that country.  Or it could have been in response to his silence about the devastation of the church’s sexual abuse and homosexuality scandal in the US and elsewhere, or about his criticism of the US planning to “build a wall” when he himself lives comfortably behind the walls of the Vatican (where no refugees are allowed).  It could have been about his outspokenness about global warming and plastic in the ocean which seems well beyond the remit of his role or the scientific knowledge he possesses. There are many things that could motivate people to say he is #notmypope.

But the thing is, he is my pope.  And if you are Catholic, he is yours too.  Here is why I think we need to embrace that we have Pope Francis as the current occupier of St Peter’s seat, and why God didn’t make a mistake (obviously) in allowing the Cardinals to elect this pope:

  • We get the pope we, as a people, deserve.  If it makes your skin crawl seeing the Pope with Michael Moore, as it did mine, let it sink in that maybe as the body of the faithful we aren’t so hot either.  We know from the book of Revelations that Jesus said “So, because you are lukewarm, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth”. This is a wakeup call that there are many of us who have been lukewarm in our devotion to our faith- and the time is coming that we will be “spit out” if we don’t get serious.
  • There are some major, major problems in the church.  If we had a great pope, like we had with Pope John Paul II, for instance, we can be lulled into a feeling that all is well- because he was a saint leading his flock and a very holy man.  We can’t afford to be lulled now. The press loves the stories about children being molested in the Catholic church – and even though the statistics aren’t clear on whether this is a bigger issue in the Catholic church than among other denominations, it is unequivocally horrible.  In addition to child molestation, priests who have taken a vow of chastity who have (mostly male) lovers on the side, who embezzle money from their parishes to pay hush money, who seduce teen altar boys and young men in the seminary-these are also scandals that need to be taken very, very seriously not only by the church hierarchy but also by us, the members of the churches.  Everything is definitely not ok in the church and we need to come together to do what we can to fix it.
  • And what about us?  It is super easy to criticise the Pope, or others in the clergy, but how are we living?  How many Catholics pick and choose the rules they want to live by- and how is that different from a priest deciding that as long as he is otherwise a good guy it is ok to have a boyfriend on the side?  How many of us use birth control, vote for politicians who are pro-abortion, are ok with premarital sex, don’t go to church every Sunday, don’t participate in the sacrament of reconciliation – and the list goes on?  I would suggest that before we get carried away in our criticism of the Pope, we evaluate how we are living and make the necessary changes.
  • It is so, so easy to be a Catholic in the West- even though it is the last remaining group that it is ok to make fun of and discriminate against.  Nonetheless, we are able to worship freely, without fear of violence or death. It is so easy, in fact, that we need to wonder if we are being given over to ourselves and our sinful ways – because clearly there are fewer and fewer people in the west answering the call to religious life.  To me this means a couple of things – we need to see how we can help our brothers and sisters in Christ who are risking their lives to follow Jesus, and also we need to push ourselves that much harder to make our faith a force in this secular world we live in. Maybe because I live in New York City, it is so easy to see the parallels to today’s world and the last days of Sodom and Gomorrah.  Are we living in a way that is different enough that God would notice us as he did Lot?
  • We don’t get to ignore the Pope just because he does things we don’t like.  When he said that we should pray the rosary every day in October and say the St Michael the Archangel prayer every day, we should do that.  Why? Because God made a hierarchy – we can vocalize constructive criticism if it is done prayerfully and with love, but we can’t pretend that Pope Francis isn’t the pope and do it our way- unless you want to not be Catholic anymore.  Really, that is what this all boils down to- we have a choice to be Catholic but if we choose yes we need to choose it 100%.

To me this is a wake up call to all the faithful.  Catholics are often characterized by Protestants as being long on rules and short on faith and devotion.  If that is true for any of us, we need to knock it off. Pick up your Bible and read it. Pray the rosary every day – it is the greatest weapon we will ever have against sin in this world.  Pray for the Pope, and all the clergy. Go to Mass on Sunday and get excited about the fact that you are in the presence of the risen Lord, Jesus Christ. Make sure that when the hour comes, it can’t be said that you were “lukewarm”.  If Pope Francis meeting with Michael Moore can galvanize Catholics to become more fervent in our faith, then I would say we owe a debt of gratitude to them both!